Dating is rough, trust me I know, I have tried everything to find Mr. Right. Ive found some Mr. Right Now’s , some Mr.Better off Friends and some Mr.Not EVERs. My friends have always told me to try onine dating and see what I can find on there. I mean why not I know people that have met the love of their life from an online profile and being a blogger I spend 90% of my time on the internet anyways, so it couldn’t hurt. I set up the profile and the away I went. After about a week or so I have 3 dates lined up and I thought that this was going great until I went on some of the worst dates of my life. Don’t get me wrong I went on some great ones too. And I haven’t found Mr. Right Quite yet but I know that I found my mojo and confidence to know what I want thru this experience. And have learned a lot of what to go and what not to do when online dating.
1. DO pick your profile name wisely.
There is no bigger turn off then getting a message from a guy that read “ Hello Beautiful” and then see that the profile namehe chose was “BigBootyLover” or “DoggyStyle69”. Your profile name is the first thing a potential date sees. Make sure it is something that is cute and not crude. That being said don’t have it be your full name either. That will just lead to a full on online stalking sesh from your potential dates and I mean some mystery is good.
2. DONT Talk about all your former relationship issues on your profile or date.
I don’t know how many times I have gone on a date with a guy from these sites that brought up way too much about their ex. This is a BIG NO NO. Unless they ask you about your past relationships and why it ended, don’t bring it up. If they do ask, keep it short and sweet and move on from that. This is not something to talk about on the first date and I don’t wanna hear about how I ordered the same sushi roll that your ex used to order when you were together before she decided to get pregnant by your best friend and leave you .Also don’t up this stuff up on your profile either. This is the first impression you are giving so please don’t have a disclaimer on your page that says all the things you cant stand in a women and what you wont put up with.
3. DO put some effort in how you look in your profile pics
Profile pics should be cute and inviting. Make sure you pick a good angle and not a shirtless mirror pic from your bathroom. If your wouldn’t upload it on your Facebook page then don’t upload it on your dating profile. Lets keep it classy.
4. DONT come over dressed to your date.
I have been on so many dates that I wore some amazing heels to, thinking that all I would have to do a lot of walking in because well most amazing heels hurt like HELL. Only to have the guy say “ Hey why don’t we go for a walk down the riverfront.” or “ We don’t need a cab, lets walk to the froyo place 20 blocks away.” REALLLLLY! So save yourself and your feet from pain and know the plan before hand and plan accordingly.
5. DO be open minded.
Some of the best dates I went on were actually that I wouldn’t say was my typical “type”. Sometimes you end up really liking the ones you didn’t think you would fall for. I admit some of the dates I would go one, I would say “ Its not a date its just free dinner” as a joke but I ended up being really surprised. They didn’t turn into anything long term but dating different people helps you determine what your TYPE is. And I’m not talking about physically, Im talking personality wise.
6. DONT LIE.
Be honest in your profile because it will come out and bite you in the butt. Being forthright in your profile or on your date is important because you have to look at it as if you do meet someone who is your forever person this is your first impressions. These moments are the basis of a relationship or so you hope. You don’t want that to be built on a lie from the start. I went on a date with a guy who was super sweet, we hit it off right away, dated for a few weeks and then it came out that his profile was a lie. That he lied to me about never being married and not having kids. That is something you cant move past.
7. DO be safe
Not going to lie, for as many nice, sweet guys on online dating, there are about a million creeps. Make sure you are cautious with who you talk to, give your number to and meet up with. Always meet in a public place and tell a friend where you will be just to be safe. Better to be safe than sorry.
8. DONT overthink on the first date
The first date can be nerve wrecking, especially when it comes to online dating. This is the first time you are meeting this person face to face. A lot goes through your mind: “ What if he doesn’t look like his pics” , “ What if I don’t look enough like my pics” “ What if he lied and he’s actually a balding 60yr old man who lives in his moms basement.” Stop stressing, you are both going to be having these thoughts so just have fun! Also don’t think too far into it on the first date. Because online first date is different then a normal first date don’t over think it and start stressing about “ can I see this going long term” , “ what will our children look like” , “ what if he is team Taylor and I’m team Kimye, cause that will never work” lol Unless there is a giant red flag, give it a second date. Its more relaxed and you can get a good feel for who they are.
9. DONT give it up too quickly
Make him work for it ladies! Don’t get me wrong Im all about female empowerment so if you really want to go for it. But for me I noticed that holding off for bit when you first start seeing someone will weed out who is there for you cause they actually like you and who just wants a piece of booty.
10. DO have fun!
Dating is supposed to be fun and exciting. Have fun with it and enjoy the journey of finding Mr. Right.
xo,
Pam
It's Pamela Kieck 