I have a confession I am 30 years old and have never had a Valentine. That’s right, I’m a 30 year old Valentine’s Day Virgin! I’ve never received any of the cliche cheesy heart-shaped jewelry and the only flowers I have ever gotten on this Hallmark holiday are from my Dad. But let’s get one thing clear I’m totally fine with it!
Don’t get me wrong, I haven’t always been fine with it. I used to long for a romantic V-Day, filled with roses and champagne. But for the longest time I was a very insecure person and with that I dated guys that were, to put it bluntly, losers. And when you are not confident in yourself or what you have to offer the world you then think that these losers are the best you can get. I mean just to prove this point. I had an on again off again “relationship” (and I use that word very loosely) for 5 yrs with a man who always thought my birthday was March 15…….. for the record its May 29th. So I didn’t expect the romance to be rolled out on Valentine’s Day or any other day for that matter. I’m telling you all about this not to have you feel sorry for me, but to see that going through these terrible relationships as in turn, never having a Valentine are all things that ending up driving me to better myself. I made it a goal to learn to LOVE myself, and to find value in what I brought to the table. Once I found that love I found I didn’t have a Valentine for a whole different reason…… I REFUSE TO SETTLE.
After finally breaking away from the perpetual chain of bad dates, douchebag guys and insecurities. I took a step back to find a love for myself that I never had before. As my confidence grew, I started to truly realize what I deserved. I decided to take some time away from relationships to focus on my career and grow my brand. In that time I found my passion for sharing my stories, style, and my personal growth journey through the blog. Now, don’t get me wrong during this break I did date here and there but it is amazing how your standards change when you learn to LOVE YOURSELF! I no longer longed for the cliche Valentine’s Day date. I didn’t want to spend my Valentine’s Day with just anyone, like someone I met off of some random dating site. If I’m going to break my Valentine’s Day cherry it needs to be with someone fucking good! Now that I know what I want and deserve in a relationship, I refuse to waste my time with anything less than that!
So to no surprise I’m spending the holiday without a Valentine again this year and I couldn’t be happier. I’m so thankful what these 30yrs of solo Vdays has taught me and how it led me to ultimately fall in love with something so much more important than a silly holiday …… Myself. And in my opinion, that’s the best Valentine a girl could have!
It's Pamela Kieck 